Film is Pwn

Here at Film Is Pwn, we get lots of spam e-mails and comments that we naturally delete, but some of them are so doggone strange and unusual they genuinely amuse us, hence the “best” are collected here.  Some are basically fortune cookies without the tasteless, edible cardboard outer coat.  Some are desperate attempts to pique the readers interest and click on a mysterious link of doom, promising heretofore unknown details of Paris Hilton’s social life.  Others are bizarrely lost in translation; I picture these being transmitted from some foreign country, where someone without an understanding of American culture gets his ideas translated poorly. Here, in no particular order and no additions or edits other than ommitting links and whatnot, is the best of spam that we personally have received at Film Is Pwn:

• “It’s an interesting and advantageous offer think well if this message is worth to be deleted before to read it attentively. . . . Hello! Are you interested in a stable work or extra earnings ? I think that you are.”
• “Truckload of dead puppies”   

• How will order to understand? I have a nice joke for you) Where does satisfaction come from? A satisfactory.___________________________–/ cialys buy Chicago /– 

   

• “Good morning. A billion here, a billion there, pretty soon it adds up to real money. I am from Oman and , too, and now am writing in English, give please true I wrote the following sentence: “Some products are also regulated formerly or long to the beauty of products in the loyalty of viable marks that continue sure give the direct station of pitches.” Best regards , Tadi.”
• “Oprah found sleeping the streets . . . Don’t panic when you cannot score with the girl that you have a crush on”
• I have a fresh joke for you) Which day of the week is the best for a dental appointment? Toothday.
  ___________________________
  –/ viafra homemade /–
• “the tygers of wrath are wiser than the horses of instruction she walks unbidden from room to room.”
• “It is a pity, that now I can not express – I hurry up on job. I will be released – I will necessarily express the opinion on this question. vigara canada I have a nice joke for you people!  Why did the bunnies go on strike? They wanted a raise in celery.”
• “FDIC has officially named your bank a failed bank”
• “Do not regret on the past “
• “Men who do not foreplay are the worst”
• “Classy cheap watch looking for a wrist.”
• “SOLDOUT-We selling ROLE>”
• “Cheap respectable watches all over the world.”
• “Add peculiarity to your style with our watches.”
• “How are you. I have just found your website great. very thanks!. I am from Kuwait and know bad English, give please true I wrote the following sentence: “A parliament who makes that a growth section will launch can make the purchase or also trade a fund.” Thank you so much for your future answers . Andi.”
• “forest birth – tissue stark gerundial ewing plastic password? daly, alcoholism deadhead. borax exhortation fake derange fernery stopgap, deadhead forest presto negligee neglect derange. array escrow.”
• “Air pollution forces Beijing closure . . . 6-year-old skips school to visit strip club“
• Good joke What does it mean when the flag’s at half mast at the post office? They’re hiring.___________________________–/ cials buying /–” 

   

• “Last news for Louie Sherman – In New York has landed UFO. Click to see video!”
• “Good Day. Joy is prayer – Joy is strength – Joy is love – Joy is a net of love by which you can catch souls. I am from Yemen and too bad know English, give true I wrote the following sentence: “They are very deposit live and are fluctuated to prove and finance in enterprises they include.” With respect , Willa.”"
• “Why does not work Amazon.com? Hello! – News agency Reuters informs about not to working capacity of a site amazon.com in current of two weeks since June, 9th and corresponding it to falling of share price. Be close at work with them.”
• “Good evening. Without the capacity to provide its own information, the mind drifts into randomness. I am from Estonia and now teach English, please tell me right I wrote the following sentence: “Supplier of exclusive natural health and day spa.””
• “Good evening. Paradise is exactly like where you are right now… only much, much better.”
• “Hi guys. It is never too late to give up our prejudices. I am from Scotland and learning to write in English, please tell me right I wrote the following sentence: “Individual chance; cosmetics and personal care by p.” Best regards , Raleigh.”
• “Excuse me. Science is nothing but developed perception, interpreted intent, common sense rounded out and minutely articulated. I am from Luxembourg and now study English, give please true I wrote the following sentence: “She was ruled to express herself n’t.””
• “Switzerland To Be Devoured By Black Hole . . . Theodore Roosevelt Was A Gay Man”
• “Hey. Ordinarily he was insane, but he had lucid moments when he was merely stupid.  I am from Barbados and learning to write in English, give true I wrote the following sentence: “Copenhagen has some of the highest beautiful keepsakes in the world.””
• “Paris Hilton Tosses Dwarf On The Street . . . Paris Hilton: I Will Give My Body To The Winner Of The French Open”
• ” Change – “I am now going to make you a gift that will stay with you the rest of your life. For the rest of your life, every time you say ‘We’ve always done it that way,’ my ghost will appear and haunt you for twenty-four hours.” Grace Murray Hopper”
• “Even if you’re on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.”
• “Robocop poised for hot comeback – Terrible things happened to this cute little kitten”
• “dictate holm – maladapt expire height villa target pregnant? villa, parsley acetic. spinach cretin slot lakehurst systemization fovea, slot nehru spinach expire seminal pregnant. rummy fovea.”
• “Paris Hilton Considered For Mother Teresa Role”
• “Hi all. Smell is a potent wizard that transports you across thousand of miles and all the years you have lived.I am from Albania and now study English, give please true I wrote the following sentence: “New shares are large, although those then owned for random market are quite ultimately values.””  

• “Of all noises, I think music is the least disagreeable.”